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My boyfriend doesnt want to get a job

The problem is, he has no idea what he wants to do with his life. Whenever I bring up the subject he gets really defensive and even aggressive. I want him to plan for the future, hopefully OUR future, but at the same time, I refuse to play the role of his mother and tell him what to do with his life. Please help!

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SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: Should you continue dating someone who doesn't have a job?

If Your Boyfriend Isn’t Motivated, Will He Drag You Down?

The problem is, he has no idea what he wants to do with his life. Whenever I bring up the subject he gets really defensive and even aggressive. I want him to plan for the future, hopefully OUR future, but at the same time, I refuse to play the role of his mother and tell him what to do with his life. Please help! I see why you are frustrated. You want to build a life with your boyfriend and you are scared that he is not mature enough to be a life partner.

However, it is totally normal for a 24 year old to not have figured out his ultimate career path yet, especially in our current society. He may transition careers multiple times before deciding what he wants to ultimately do. You are not alone in your feelings of irritation. Many women are ready for marriage, commitment, kids, and stable career paths before the their partners are ready. If I had to guess, it is likely that growing up, you saw one parent disappointed with the other, so you easily fall into this role with your partner now.

Overall, I urge you to take a longer-term, wider perspective about all of this. You are so young. This blog is not intended as medical advice or diagnosis and should in no way replace consultation with a medical professional. If you try this advice and it does not work for you, you cannot sue me. This is only my opinion, based on my background, training, and experience as a therapist and person. If he is not losing sleep over her ie sold on her she should know she will need to move on.

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My Boyfriend is Wonderful, but Not Ambitious or Successful

FAQ on Coronavirus and Mefi : check before posting, cite sources; how to block content by tags. Dedicated boyfriend but unemployed and unambitious, should i end it? I'm 29, have a doctorate, make 6 figures and own my own place. I've been with a guy who is 5 years younger than me for 6 months now. When we first met he was very honest and revealed that he never finished high school but has a GED, he tried 1 semester of college but dropped out; he also disclosed without me asking that his job paid 30k a year.

My job is an important part of my life and I'm very proud of the work I do. When I talk about my job to my partner, however, she seems disinterested and often changes the subject.

You know what I am talking about. And read my 21 pieces of unsolicited advice for you, the brokenhearted. In our teens, being in the band made a man sexy. I went and confirmed it with an expert. It also highlights his self-esteem.

My Boyfriend Can’t Find a Job and It’s Driving Me Nuts!

We have known one another for about ten years dating on and off, taking a four year break at one point. We are compatible on many levels, but there is one thing that continues to turn me off from ten years ago to now and that is his lack of ambition to be successful professionally. I find the sexiest thing about a man is his intelligence, and no matter if a person is well read or not, a great deal of intelligence comes from professional life experience. I should be happy to have a man who loves me and I can trust. I think everyone here can feel your pain. In such circumstances, there are no decisions to be made. Which means the world is grey, not black and white.

Ask Dr. NerdLove: My Boyfriend Won’t Look For Work

He is a best-selling author, regularly appears on radio and in magazines, and runs exclusive couples' retreats. I work in a creative industry and despite spending late nights and days on big projects he never really asks me how work is going. He cares about me in every other aspect of our relationship but he just never wants to discuss work, even after a really wonderful day where something has happened I'm really proud of — he will briefly address it but nothing much more than that. How do I bring this conversation up with him and let him know that I want him to care and make it a positive conversation? You're not being overly sensitive at all.

Part of it is my doing — I encouraged him to quit his job in December without having something lined up, which goes against my usual advice.

You love him, but your boyfriend has no goals, ambitions or even motivation for the future. His perspective is bound to affect your relationship eventually — as well your feelings for him. She says:. I appreciate that he is a hard worker, but he is constantly stuck in dead end jobs at minimum wage.

My Boyfriend Won’t Get A Better Job

Editor's Note: Every Monday, Lori Gottlieb answers questions from readers about their problems, big and small. Have a question? Email her at dear.

Christina, 29, has been with her serious boyfriend for several years. Whenever they go anywhere, she now pays for them both. This could go one of two ways: It could be the catalyst for your breakup, or it could be the first major challenge that you and your boyfriend get through together. Neither will be fun or sexy. Of course, you need to be very strategic about this. In , my then-boyfriend quit a job he hated without another one lined up, and it took a lot more time than either of us expected for him to find something new.

Dear Therapist: When I Bring Up Anything Serious, My Boyfriend Falls Apart

Hello, all you disturbing pheromone wolves, and welcome to Ask Dr. NerdLove , the only dating advice column to help you remaster your love life for 4K and help your relationship look and feel the way you remember it when it was new. How do you find a relationship when the only people who are interested in you are emotionally unavailable? And what do you do when moving with your boyfriend is starting to give you nightmares? I have read your answers before on Kotaku and your responses have been really good. Honestly talking to my friends has given me conflicting and confusing answers and is generally not helpful, so finally, I figured I need to reach out to someone who actually knows what they are talking about. So some background on me, I was quite late to the dating game, only having my first real girlfriend at the age of

May 19, - I want to jump out of my skin and slap that person silly. You have done an amazing job of standing by your unemployed person's side I'm frustrated bc my live in bf doesn't understand the stress I feel already trying to raise.

Recently, my colleagues had a discussion about a trend in couples that we have observed where one partner refuses to get a job to support the household or have a stable employment. Here are some reasons why people choose to stay with a partner who refuses to work. Even though you may start to feel a lot of hurt, anger, and resentment towards your partner, ultimately you stay in the relationship because you are getting something out of it. You have to be honest with yourself and explore what that is.

Don’t Marry Your Man If He Lacks These 4 Traits

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Comments: 5
  1. Nijin

    Bravo, is simply excellent idea

  2. Mazujora

    Yes, I with you definitely agree

  3. Kagagal

    You the abstract person

  4. Daitaxe

    You are not right.

  5. Nikozil

    The absurd situation has turned out

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