Site Logo
Looking for girlfriend > Looking for a girlfriend > What to look for in a guy before dating him

What to look for in a guy before dating him

Site Logo

And what you expect from a guy and from a happy relationship would be very different from what your friend expects. Instead of taking pointers from friends or asking for their opinions all the time, sometimes the easiest way to figure out if a guy is a good match for you is by testing your compatibility with him, keeping your own expectations in mind. A guy could seem perfect for you, your friends may love him, and you may be falling hard for him too. What you see as cocky may be interpreted as confidence by another girl, and what you believe is coy and cute could be misunderstood as low self esteem by a guy you like!

SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: 7 Standards To Look For In Man (especially #6) - Signs He's Right For You

Content:

8 Things To Know About Someone Before You Date Them

Site Logo

Any new relationship is full of challenges. You're getting to know someone, and there's no telling when something might happen to burst the bubble of your new romance.

In general, it's fun learning all there is to know about someone who used to be a stranger. But sometimes, there will be signs that you shouldn't take things further. Everyone has their own quirks and opinions, and someone who's a bit different isn't a reason to run for the hills.

But it's a major red flag if you find yourself compromising on yourself or feeling uncomfortable. Business Insider asked eight relationship experts, many who specialise in helping people who have been in abusive relationships, about what they think are the major red flags. There is a psychological phenomenon known as the 'confirmation bias,' where we are inclined to discard all evidence that does not align with our views and only keep those that do.

And with a potentially toxic person, they have worked to create a false positive impression to worm their way into your heart. He could be all that -- the sleekest toxic people are. Our brains work overtime to convince us of someone who's not good for us, even when our guts know it. That's perfectly normal and healthy. But it's how you handle those disagreements that can really make or break things. Does your partner walk away?

Shut down? Place all the blame on you? Throw a tantrum? These are all red flags. No one needs to win or lose. It's about expressing how something makes you feel and being heard.

Communication is key. Are they comfortable with using us? Because it just shows a real clear lack of care. Or the person says, 'Well, I can't right now,' when they're not really that busy. One person is giving and giving and giving, and the other person gives one back. There's an imbalance. And the other selfish person is typically fine with their needs being met.

It's a habitual pattern. It's almost like life is there to meet their needs and people are just commodities to get that done. Past relationship history is key to understanding their behaviors, as is the way they talk about past partners.

If everyone in their past was 'crazy,' that is a huge red flag. If the date says one thing and does another, look deep into yourself and tell yourself it will only get worse and walk away.

If you are dating someone who tries to rush a relationship without giving you time to get to know them properly, slow it down yourself and take control.

If they are not patient with this request, you get out. A soulmate will be kind and patient, while abusers rush to confuse victims and to control.

If you prove hard to control quickly, an abuser will back off, and you will save yourself heartache. Rather than listening to your concern and apologising, they will manipulate and flip the conversation, telling you all the things you've done to hurt and upset them. They don't care about you and your concerns; they only care about themselves.

Narcissists are void of empathy. They don't believe they are wrong about anything, and they will constantly feel victimised, accusing you of attacking them when you're just expressing your feelings in a situation. This is definitely a reason to distance yourself from the person you're dating. Narcissistic abuse is emotionally and psychologically damaging to their partners and most everyone they interact with.

Whatever they have done in previous relationships they are likely to do again. It practically shouts: 'I cannot take any responsibility for whatever went wrong. I have not learned anything from these relationships. It is totally up to you to make our relationship work.

When they started dating these other people, they probably saw them as highly desirable and all good. Now that these relationships are over, these same people are all bad. Either they have a knack for picking the absolutely worst people with whom to be in a relationship, or they are seeing all of these people in a very distorted way.

Read the original article on Business Insider UK. You can find our Community Guidelines in full here. Want to discuss real-world problems, be involved in the most engaging discussions and hear from the journalists?

Start your Independent Premium subscription today. Independent Premium Comments can be posted by members of our membership scheme, Independent Premium. It allows our most engaged readers to debate the big issues, share their own experiences, discuss real-world solutions, and more. Our journalists will try to respond by joining the threads when they can to create a true meeting of independent Premium.

The most insightful comments on all subjects will be published daily in dedicated articles. You can also choose to be emailed when someone replies to your comment. The existing Open Comments threads will continue to exist for those who do not subscribe to Independent Premium. Due to the sheer scale of this comment community, we are not able to give each post the same level of attention, but we have preserved this area in the interests of open debate. Please continue to respect all commenters and create constructive debates.

Long reads. Coronavirus Advice. Lockdown Guide. UK Politics. Lib Dems. Green Party. Boris Johnson. Jeremy Corbyn. US Politics. Help The Hungry. Shappi Khorsandi. Mary Dejevsky. Robert Fisk. Mark Steel. Janet Street-Porter.

John Rentoul. Matthew Norman. Sean O'Grady. Tom Peck. Andrew Grice. Rugby union. US sports. Miguel Delaney. Streaming Hub. Geoffrey Macnab. Clarisse Loughrey. Ed Cumming. Royal Family. Tech news. Tech culture. The Competition. Money transfers. Health insurance. Money Deals.

Voucher Codes. Just Eat. National Trust. Climate Blogs.

10 Things You Should Know About a Guy Before You Date Him

Any new relationship is full of challenges. You're getting to know someone, and there's no telling when something might happen to burst the bubble of your new romance. In general, it's fun learning all there is to know about someone who used to be a stranger. But sometimes, there will be signs that you shouldn't take things further. Everyone has their own quirks and opinions, and someone who's a bit different isn't a reason to run for the hills.

Getting back into the dating game can be tough, especially if you just got out of an LTR. From the very beginning, you're stuck wondering if you should try to become one of the many online dating success stories, or meet someone "organically" like your parents and grandparents probably did.

So you've got your eye on that cutie who's been in your life as of late and you're wondering whether or not he could be serious boyfriend material. We've all been there, and we've found that there are some very good indicators of this that you can find when you take a look at his everyday life. How a guy interacts with his family is often very closely aligned with how he'll interact with a significant other. Pay special attention to his attitude toward his mother and his sisters, if he has any, is he respectful towards the women in his life or does his behavior leave a lot to be desired?

12 Things to Look for in a Guy Before You Date Him!

He makes his way toward you with a slight intentional limp in his step, otherwise known as his swagger walk. Run girl, run! He uses douchey pick-up lines. He expects you to be convenient. One trait toxic dudes all have in common is that they expect you to operate on their schedule and get mad when you have plans of your own. As crazy as this logic seems, there are plenty of guys who actually think this way. With him, what you see is what you get. End of story. Anyone who can read can follow a recipe. Instead of asking girls on dates, they tell them.

.

.

.

.

SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: How long should you know a guy before dating him?

.

.

It'll help you make an opinion about him, and most importantly, it'll help you test the compatibility. 10 things to look for in a guy before you date him! There are a.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Comments: 5
  1. Disho

    It seems excellent phrase to me is

  2. Shakarr

    It has surprised me.

  3. Nelkis

    In my opinion you commit an error. I can prove it. Write to me in PM, we will talk.

  4. Mezitaxe

    I apologise, but, in my opinion, you are mistaken. Let's discuss. Write to me in PM, we will communicate.

  5. Tujar

    In my opinion you commit an error.

Thanks! Your comment will appear after verification.
Add a comment

© 2020 Online - Advisor on specific issues.